Romantic Conflict
ÇATIŞMA VE ÇATIŞMA ÇÖZÜM STİLLERİ
1.1. Conflict
Several definitions were existed in order to explain conflict. Conflicts was central part of the marriage and romantic relationships, and also of all human association, and many researchers and counselors have focused on the conflict and especially on how conflict gets resolved in relationships (Christensen & Heavey, 1990; Thomas, 1976; Fincham & Beach, 1999; Gottman, 1993; Gottman, Markman, & Notarius, 1977; Greeff & Bruyne, 2000; Kurdek, 1994). Thomas (1976), had been described that conflict as a situation that triggers struggle between romantic partners and he proposed that if conflict remains unresolved or ends with disunity, it could repeat again in later situations (Thomas, 1976). Peterson (1983) explained conflict as an ‘Interpersonal process that occurs whenever the actions of one individual interfere with the actions of another’ (Peterson, 1983, pg.148) According to Dhir and Markman (1984), when current solutions are unsatisfied and not mutual, if partner’s situation of struggle against each other lasted too long, conflictual situation occurs. Dhir and Markman (1984) put an emphasis on the interdependency between partners and that dependency could cause failure of conflict resolution strategies which were played important role to overcome the struggles of couples. Rahim (1985), defined conflict was disagreement on several issues between couples, but rather than the matter of issue, how issues were handled by partners had much more importance, in long term healthiness of romantic relationships (Rahim, 1985).
Gottman and Levenson (1992) claimed that the principal part of the essence of healthy relationships was the highly satisfied couples which had capacity to find collaborative solutions of their problems and had capacity to cope with their conflicts in a constructive way. Regardless of the fact that conflict was received as problematic in relationships for individuals, partners could be capable of handling the conflict cooperatively, and this cooperative way of resolving conflict was related with higher relationship satisfaction (Gotman, 1993). Conflict could also refer to contradiction or argument between couples (Laursen & Collins, 1994). Mackey (2000) defined conflict was a state of disagreement in romantic relationships that emerged from differences between partners. Guerro, Andersen, Afifi (2001) argued that most married couples find themselves to tie up different types of conflict throughout of their marriages. However, if those conflict issues could be discussed between partners, they would be satisfied, on the other hand dissatisfied couples were more likely to minimize or retreat disagreements in their marriages (Guerro, Andersen & Afifi, 2001). Discussing and processing issues which could cause conflict between partners was important in relationships. Especially, how partners were coping with those conflicts in their current relationships is related with how satisfied they would be in their relationships (Erber & Erber, 2001). Wood (2007) claimed that conflictual situations effect dynamic of power between partners by forcing them to debate the extent to which they share power (Wood, 2007)
Thus, highlighting conflict in romantic relationships has essential importance in romantic relationships and marriages because; the emergence of patterns of conflict within a relationship could undermine or invigorate the well being of relationship and mental health of individuals (Gottman, 1993). Attaining romantic relationship conflict patterns of individuals, and especially, to put an emphasis on constructive way of conflict behaviors could give opportunity to reconstruct attitudes into positive way so it ensured happiness and longevity of relationships. On the other hand, if destructive style of conflict handling behaviors were used by couples to minimize their conflict, maintaining consistent relationship satisfaction in romantic relationships was become challenge for both of the partners (Stephanou, 2012). Conflict handling patterns of partners were identifier and important factors in order to predict how the romantic relationship will proceed and in order to determine relationship satisfaction between partners, couple’s conflict resolution behaviors should be discussed (Birnbaum, Mikulincer & Austerlitz, 2013).
1.2. Conflict Resolution Styles
When encountered with a conflictual situation, the individual could engage in different conflict resolution behaviors (Eckstein, 2011). Conflict resolution styles was referred to the conflict response patterns which contained repeated use of behaviors in order to find solution for disagreements of partners and such styles could provide chance to understand how people tend to deal with conflict (Hocker & Wilmot, 1991). According to Eckstein (2011), conflict styles of couples in the relationship were determined by different needs and opinions and conflict resolution styles were handled by couples differently. It could change from situation to situation but which styles individuals generally used declared his/her effectiveness, healthiness or destructive way of resolution skill, and also couples could utilized one of conflict management styles or mixture of them (Eckstein, 2011). In the literature, conflict resolution strategies have been studied using a variety of different approaches and definitions (Thomas, 1976; Rahim & Bonoma, 1979; Canary & Cupach, 1988; Kurdek, 1994, Hojjat, 2000)
Primarily, Thomas (1976) had described two independent dimensions of resolution behaviors in conflictual situations which were; assertiveness and cooperativeness. Assertiveness; is a model of behavior of being self-assured and confident. Cooperativeness, on the other hand is an attribution about concerning to found appropriate solutions in the relation, not being self centered and hostile (Cloninger, Svrakic & Przybeck, 1993). According the two dimensions, Thomas (1976) defined five conflict management behaviors; competing, collaborating, compromising, avoiding and accommodating. Competing; is defined (distributive) as being more concerned with own interests rather than their partner’s interests. People who prefer to use competing style when encountered with conflict; s/he was raking to be assertive, uncooperative and recognizes conflicts as win or loses situations. Competing is characterized by high assertiveness, and low cooperativeness (Thomas, 1976). Compromising; means as coming together for mutual aim with partner. Compromise is characterized by high concern for others and high concern for self. Collaborating; is defined as a conflict style which focuses on cooperative problem solving for both of the partners and recognizes conflicts as win or win situations. Collaborating is identified by a high degree of concern for self and others (Thomas, 1976). Avoiding; is synonymously mean escaping or withdrawal, is characterized by both unassertiveness and uncooperativeness. Avoiding is defined as a conflict resolution style which included withdrawal behaviors, escaping from conflictual situations. Accommodating; is known as obliging, being indirect and passive and it represents a high concern for other and a very low concern for self. Furthermore, Rahim and Bonoma (1979) identified two dimensions of romantic partner conflict resolution which were concern for self and concern for others. Concern for self is indicated the degree of individual’s own attent to satisfy their needs, whereas concern for others is indicated the degree of individual’s own attends to satisfy others’ needs. According to the two dimensions, Rahim and Bonoma (1979) had identified five different conflict resolution behaviors; compromising, integrating, avoiding, obliging and dominating. Integrating is a style, which is included high level of concern for self and concern for others whereas avoiding is related with low levels of both dimensions. Obliging style is stated with low concern for self, but high concern for others; conversely dominating style is high in concern for self, but low in concern for others. Compromising involves equal levels of both dimensions.
1.1. Conflict
Several definitions were existed in order to explain conflict. Conflicts was central part of the marriage and romantic relationships, and also of all human association, and many researchers and counselors have focused on the conflict and especially on how conflict gets resolved in relationships (Christensen & Heavey, 1990; Thomas, 1976; Fincham & Beach, 1999; Gottman, 1993; Gottman, Markman, & Notarius, 1977; Greeff & Bruyne, 2000; Kurdek, 1994). Thomas (1976), had been described that conflict as a situation that triggers struggle between romantic partners and he proposed that if conflict remains unresolved or ends with disunity, it could repeat again in later situations (Thomas, 1976). Peterson (1983) explained conflict as an ‘Interpersonal process that occurs whenever the actions of one individual interfere with the actions of another’ (Peterson, 1983, pg.148) According to Dhir and Markman (1984), when current solutions are unsatisfied and not mutual, if partner’s situation of struggle against each other lasted too long, conflictual situation occurs. Dhir and Markman (1984) put an emphasis on the interdependency between partners and that dependency could cause failure of conflict resolution strategies which were played important role to overcome the struggles of couples. Rahim (1985), defined conflict was disagreement on several issues between couples, but rather than the matter of issue, how issues were handled by partners had much more importance, in long term healthiness of romantic relationships (Rahim, 1985).
Gottman and Levenson (1992) claimed that the principal part of the essence of healthy relationships was the highly satisfied couples which had capacity to find collaborative solutions of their problems and had capacity to cope with their conflicts in a constructive way. Regardless of the fact that conflict was received as problematic in relationships for individuals, partners could be capable of handling the conflict cooperatively, and this cooperative way of resolving conflict was related with higher relationship satisfaction (Gotman, 1993). Conflict could also refer to contradiction or argument between couples (Laursen & Collins, 1994). Mackey (2000) defined conflict was a state of disagreement in romantic relationships that emerged from differences between partners. Guerro, Andersen, Afifi (2001) argued that most married couples find themselves to tie up different types of conflict throughout of their marriages. However, if those conflict issues could be discussed between partners, they would be satisfied, on the other hand dissatisfied couples were more likely to minimize or retreat disagreements in their marriages (Guerro, Andersen & Afifi, 2001). Discussing and processing issues which could cause conflict between partners was important in relationships. Especially, how partners were coping with those conflicts in their current relationships is related with how satisfied they would be in their relationships (Erber & Erber, 2001). Wood (2007) claimed that conflictual situations effect dynamic of power between partners by forcing them to debate the extent to which they share power (Wood, 2007)
Thus, highlighting conflict in romantic relationships has essential importance in romantic relationships and marriages because; the emergence of patterns of conflict within a relationship could undermine or invigorate the well being of relationship and mental health of individuals (Gottman, 1993). Attaining romantic relationship conflict patterns of individuals, and especially, to put an emphasis on constructive way of conflict behaviors could give opportunity to reconstruct attitudes into positive way so it ensured happiness and longevity of relationships. On the other hand, if destructive style of conflict handling behaviors were used by couples to minimize their conflict, maintaining consistent relationship satisfaction in romantic relationships was become challenge for both of the partners (Stephanou, 2012). Conflict handling patterns of partners were identifier and important factors in order to predict how the romantic relationship will proceed and in order to determine relationship satisfaction between partners, couple’s conflict resolution behaviors should be discussed (Birnbaum, Mikulincer & Austerlitz, 2013).
1.2. Conflict Resolution Styles
When encountered with a conflictual situation, the individual could engage in different conflict resolution behaviors (Eckstein, 2011). Conflict resolution styles was referred to the conflict response patterns which contained repeated use of behaviors in order to find solution for disagreements of partners and such styles could provide chance to understand how people tend to deal with conflict (Hocker & Wilmot, 1991). According to Eckstein (2011), conflict styles of couples in the relationship were determined by different needs and opinions and conflict resolution styles were handled by couples differently. It could change from situation to situation but which styles individuals generally used declared his/her effectiveness, healthiness or destructive way of resolution skill, and also couples could utilized one of conflict management styles or mixture of them (Eckstein, 2011). In the literature, conflict resolution strategies have been studied using a variety of different approaches and definitions (Thomas, 1976; Rahim & Bonoma, 1979; Canary & Cupach, 1988; Kurdek, 1994, Hojjat, 2000)
Primarily, Thomas (1976) had described two independent dimensions of resolution behaviors in conflictual situations which were; assertiveness and cooperativeness. Assertiveness; is a model of behavior of being self-assured and confident. Cooperativeness, on the other hand is an attribution about concerning to found appropriate solutions in the relation, not being self centered and hostile (Cloninger, Svrakic & Przybeck, 1993). According the two dimensions, Thomas (1976) defined five conflict management behaviors; competing, collaborating, compromising, avoiding and accommodating. Competing; is defined (distributive) as being more concerned with own interests rather than their partner’s interests. People who prefer to use competing style when encountered with conflict; s/he was raking to be assertive, uncooperative and recognizes conflicts as win or loses situations. Competing is characterized by high assertiveness, and low cooperativeness (Thomas, 1976). Compromising; means as coming together for mutual aim with partner. Compromise is characterized by high concern for others and high concern for self. Collaborating; is defined as a conflict style which focuses on cooperative problem solving for both of the partners and recognizes conflicts as win or win situations. Collaborating is identified by a high degree of concern for self and others (Thomas, 1976). Avoiding; is synonymously mean escaping or withdrawal, is characterized by both unassertiveness and uncooperativeness. Avoiding is defined as a conflict resolution style which included withdrawal behaviors, escaping from conflictual situations. Accommodating; is known as obliging, being indirect and passive and it represents a high concern for other and a very low concern for self. Furthermore, Rahim and Bonoma (1979) identified two dimensions of romantic partner conflict resolution which were concern for self and concern for others. Concern for self is indicated the degree of individual’s own attent to satisfy their needs, whereas concern for others is indicated the degree of individual’s own attends to satisfy others’ needs. According to the two dimensions, Rahim and Bonoma (1979) had identified five different conflict resolution behaviors; compromising, integrating, avoiding, obliging and dominating. Integrating is a style, which is included high level of concern for self and concern for others whereas avoiding is related with low levels of both dimensions. Obliging style is stated with low concern for self, but high concern for others; conversely dominating style is high in concern for self, but low in concern for others. Compromising involves equal levels of both dimensions.
|
Yazan
|
Bu makaleden alıntı yapmak
için alıntı yapılan yazıya aşağıdaki ibare eklenmelidir: "Romantic Conflict" başlıklı makalenin tüm hakları yazarı Uzm.Psk.Şeyma KAMA'e aittir ve makale, yazarı tarafından TavsiyeEdiyorum.com (http://www.tavsiyeediyorum.com) kütüphanesinde yayınlanmıştır. Bu ibare eklenmek şartıyla, makaleden Fikir ve Sanat Eserleri Kanununa uygun kısa alıntılar yapılabilir, ancak Uzm.Psk.Şeyma KAMA'nın izni olmaksızın makalenin tamamı başka bir mecraya kopyalanamaz veya başka yerde yayınlanamaz. |
Beğenin 
Yazan Uzman
|
| Makale Kütüphanemizden | ||||
|
Sitemizde yer alan döküman ve yazılar uzman üyelerimiz tarafından hazırlanmış ve pek çoğu bilimsel düzeyde yapılmış çalışmalar olduğundan güvenilir mahiyette eserlerdir. Bununla birlikte TavsiyeEdiyorum.com sitesi ve çalışma sahipleri, yazıların içerdiği bilgilerin güvenilirliği veya güncelliği konusunda hukuki bir güvence vermezler. Sitemizde yayınlanan yazılar bilgi amaçlı kaleme alınmış ve profesyonellere yönelik olarak
hazırlanmıştır. Site ziyaretçilerimizin o meslekle ilgili bir uzmanla görüşmeden, yazı içindeki bilgileri kendi başlarına kullanmamaları gerekmektedir. Yazıların telif hakkı tamamen yazarlarına aittir, eserler sahiplerinin muvaffakatı olmadan hiçbir suretle çoğaltılamaz, başka bir
yerde kullanılamaz, kopyala yapıştır yöntemiyle başka mecralara aktarılamaz. Sitemizde yer alan herhangi bir yazı başkasına ait telif haklarını ihlal ediyor, intihal içeriyor veya yazarın mensubu bulunduğu mesleğin meslek için etik kurallarına aykırılıklar taşıyorsa, yazının kaldırılabilmesi için site yönetimimize bilgi verilmelidir.
